Distractions

I see an apple, what's the big deal?

Today I am in what you would all call "denial".  It's far more pleasant then what I call "reality", which most of you still get to escape in some way and I am in it 24/7. So I need a little break and I am going to distract myself with pleasant thoughts and fantasies.

My feelings for FB haven't changed

The fascists over at Spacebook banned my blog completely after my post last week. I am now considered abusive which both amuses me and pisses me off greatly. I have tried to rectify the situation, but it seems pretty futile to me. How many times can I fill out the same form and get zero response? I'm in for three times, I might do it once more today, so to answer my own question, it's four or maybe three, if I distract myself successfully! You should all look for me over on Google+, where my blog is not banned.



I could go on ranting but that isn't very funny and isn't that what FB is for anyway? So I won't get into the a**holes at Mass Health today and I will instead talk about how ridiculous Lynn Shore Drive is at any given time.


I walk there at least once a week with a friend. I will now only refer to it as The United Nations, (thanks Lynne) and if you have ever been there then you totally get that. 

I will explain: It's one of the most culturally diverse places; you've got Russians, Vietnamese/Cambodian, Indian, Hispanic, Black, White Trash. 

And then you've also got Mounted Police, Dogs, Bikes, Skates, Runners, Walkers, Skateboarders, Children Screaming Children, Prostitutes, Homeless, NA/AA people, future NA/AA people, poop and things that look like poop. I'm sure I am missing a category or two, and an ethnicity.

DSKE KEEWWING!

You don't want this water touching you

So we walk from the Swampscott side to Lynn, until the smell becomes unbearable and we turn around and go back toward a slightly less smelly existence. 
 
Apparently the smell is from some algae that they can't get rid of; but I think it's a combo of that and the always bacteria ridden waters. You always see kids, dogs and overweight people  obliviously swimming their silly non-English reading hearts out. I always think to myself "I hope they don't have any cuts or open wounds, or a weakened immune system", and then I laugh out loud.



My favorite people on Lynn Shore Drive are the Corpsey kids; they are usually the bored over-privileged youth from Swampscott that are eerily pale and seemingly have no feelings other than gloomy. 

Her parents are rich, yet she is increasingly miserable & bored

We have also been critiquing the runners, and haven't seen a Gazelle on the shore yet. So far, we have seen the Gay Handed Runner & Robot Runner and I love them both equally! I promise I will start taking pictures.


My friend and I are pretty certain that everyone there believes that we are a Lesbian couple, so we fit right in. 


I'm off for a walk, sadly just around town and not to The United Nations. 


Splendid then...

How I spent my last day of being 41...

It happened. I'm inching closer and closer toward my AARP membership; I turned 42 yesterday. To make myself feel better, I've been telling everyone that I am 24, I've been weeping quietly under the covers.

Blissfully awaiting the arrival of my AARP card!

Sunday, my last day of my pseudo-youth was quite an extravagant forgettable day. I spent the first half cleaning my kitchen and bathroom and fighting with the hub because our douche of a neighbor approached him with a hammer, yes a fucking hammer; and complained that I've been turning on the hallway light at night when I come home and he's paying for the electricity. 

My neighbor was clearly traumatized by Lester Light bulb

I'm sorry...WHAT?!! How rude of me to not want to come home alone, in total darkness. The switch that I'm using to turn on the light is in fact downstairs. I am paying for the god damned electricity, on that PIG of a low watt energy saver bulb... give me a fucking break! This is the same guy, that has parked me in all winter, without once thinking he is inconveniencing me in any way at all. Yeah, I love having to knock on your door daily, and then wait 5-10 minutes for you to come out and move your truck, THANKS!

Candy has been hittin' that pipe pretty hard!

Most recently, he and his delightful trashy girlfriend Candy,  and their adorable crappy baby have moved from their apartment on the other side of the house, to the one above me. I should play the lottery. She spends from about 4am to 11pm stomping back and forth above me like she's going to come crashing through the ceiling. Where the fuck is she going? Is she smoking crack all day and pacing the halls? I'm seriously seconds away from the FINAL SNAP and I can't be held responsible for my actions.

Anyway, I got distracted by my major annoyance of a neighbor. Getting back to my exciting lackluster last day of being 41.

Where Candy scores her crack

I decided it would be a great idea to get Mexican for dinner. Yes, I wanted to end the year with a bang, or some sort of explosion! So my friend took me to a a taco joint in Lynn. 
(Lynn, Lynn, city of sin, you don't come out the way you went in! Especially if you eat a burrito with re fried beans!) 



I ordered a burrito and she ordered a quesadilla; we both ended up with burritos.

This would have been a wiser meal choice

That thing stayed with me for the rest of the night and most of my birthday. What a painful and stupid last meal. 




My friend did give me the bestest gift ever; a Panda bear ring! 

Magical Panda ring!

I love Pandas and will someday invest in a SUPER AWESOME Panda costume that I will wear randomly while out and about in the city!

RAWR!! More Bamboo Please!

 

To finish off such an eventful day/evening, we sat in my truck while it poured outside. Why? Good question! I had to bring my laptop outside as my T-mobile suck stick web stick, doesn't work so great indoors. Why did I need to go online when I had company at the house? We had a brilliant idea that I should join Twitter and spend the last five hours of my 41st year trying to connect to the site and picking a user name that wasn't taken. 


My first tweet: unimpressed

My second tweet at the ripe old age of 42, had taken me six hours and counting... I may very well get my AARP card before this tweet posts!

I may be getting older, but I'm quite doubtful that I'm getting wiser.


Splendid then...