Monday, March 14, 2011

My immune system has gone missing; maybe it's with my mind...

I was stricken with the plague, as you know from my last tale; My cough drops tell me what to do, I have been sick and it became worse! My flu turned into a horrible stomach flu, and I willed most of it to come out of my ass.  
This looks about right!

Of course the first two rounds were a wonderful combo where I had to sit on the toilet and puke in a bucket, (and all over myself), simultaneously. I hate puking. I'm not a big fan of liquid poop either, but given a choice, the lower option is far less traumatic.  It was hell on earth I tell you, and hell is much colder and smellier than I had imagined it to be.

It took several more days for me to feel human again, and I am still having small bouts of nausea with certain foods and smells. 

I'm the one on the right
So speed up to Saturday... I was supposed to work at the bar that night, but the hub and I were having quite an ugly exchange of words and I decided I was far too pissed off to help him out that evening.

I called my good friend and cried for a bit and she asked if I wanted to go out for dinner. I'm horrible with decision making to begin with, but worse so when I'm upset. I hadn't had a good solid meal since the flu and was seriously craving some rare roast beef for the last couple of days. I initially said no, and then I said "well I probably should leave the house, it has been a long time. She and her boyfriend picked me up and we were off to Texas Roadhouse.

Mind you, I have never been to Texas Roadhouse so I had no idea what to expect other than lots of meat! I knew Swayze wouldn't be there nor would Jeff Healy, so my expectations were low.

It was PACKED! 45 minute wait. The staff all looked to be about 15 years old and they all had employee shirts on that said "I love my job" on the back. I was thinking about using that on my bars shirts, as a cruel joke. I don't think many in the restaurant industry can say straight faced that they love their job. 

We ate some peanuts an entire barrel full of peanuts, while waiting for a table.

Me, in a heavenly state
As soon as we were seated I made the dining faux pas of eating as much bread as humanly possible. I could hear Marge Simpsons voice in my head saying "Homey don't fill up on bread" but I couldn't stop! I wish they had barrels full of bread instead of peanuts!

Fast forward to being completely satisfied and over stuffed with bread and potato while driving through Danvers Square.

Looking out my passenger window I notice that the Kentucky Fried Chicken sign is completely lit up and it now says Kentucky Fried Chi. 

My chi is southern deep fried... funny I always assumed it was dark chocolate.

Splendid then...

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